It may seem impossible to fall asleep when the person next to you in bed in snoring like a wild beast, but there is always a way around things…

The first thing you have to do is calm yourself and purge your mind of all evil thoughts. Stop considering the possibility of suffocation. Just think, you will NEVER be able to sleep soundly in a jail cell. So just relaaaaax.

The second thing you should do is try to be selfless, and instead of dwelling on how much sleep you are losing, bask in the thought of how much sleep they are gaining. Pleasant, isn’t it?

Okay, maybe not at first but if you try really hard it might be appealing.

If you’ve seen that both these methods are not helpful, give the person a little nudge. Chances are they will move around a bit in reaction to your touch and stop snoring.

Maybe for good….

In which case you lay there, enjoying the calm, the quiet, the serenity….

Until they turn around and start it up, again.

At this point chances are you are deeply irritated. Still try to remember that you love this person (we hope you do, unless you sleep next to strangers…) and you will regret any harm you may want to inflict.

You should next try to listen to music with head phones, that way you can drone out the noise and let the music carry you off to dream land paradise….

Unless of course you are sleeping next to Chewbacca.

Then that would mean the only thing that you’ve accomplished is adding a soundtrack to your misery.

You’ve probably come to a point where you want to wake them up and let them know that they are snoring. But you realize that this will probably be a waste of energy because they are not aware that they are snoring.

Now you’re up, body aching for sleep, your mind quakes each time Chewbacca roars.

You glance over and see the culprit of your midnight hell, mouth agape in oblivious hibernation.

They disgust you.

You glance at your pillow, and then at Chewbacca, pillow; Chewbacca; pillow, Chewbacca.

The exchange continues for a while.

You’ve reached wits end, you don’t know how much longer you can take.

There is no way out, the light at the end of the tunnel is dimming. Is there no one to save you from this undeserving punishment?!

There is only one thing you can do:

Serve your sentence begrudgingly as you write a midnight blog on how to survive a night of snoring.